What to do??

Well here we are, 4:15am wide awake with nothing to do. I am sitting in the basement staring at a blank TV because for some reason I can't get the stupid thing to work. You know how sometimes all you want to do is lay on the couch and watch mindnumbing shows, well that's me right now and I can't turn dang thing on! Last night Nat, Sarah and Tim were playing video games down here so I have a sneaking suspicion that something was turned off so as to prevent me from enjoying quality programming, because at 4am it's all about Court TV and Cops is definitely on some channel, just waiting for me to watch.

The extent of my frustration only begins with the now useless TV. Today will be my fourth day back on the Lupron and let me be clear, I hate this stuff. So far I have woken up the past two nights around 3am, just basically sitting up in bed wide awake. This action always, without fail, wakes up the cat who then starts meowing and moving around in bed searching for a better spot, somewhere within petting distance. I always try to close my eyes, pet the cat and try to think calming thoughts but that is usually the exact time when Nat rolls over and begins snoring in my face. After about 15 minutes of snoring Nat and whining cat, haha that rhymes, I muster the energy to get out of dodge. The nutty thing is that even though I am wide awake I am physically tired; so making the decision to go down two flights of stairs to sit on the sofa and watch TV instead of going to the guest bedroom was huge.

I now know that I should have stayed upstairs where TV's work and beds are plentifully.

So now the next choice, should I go back upstairs or stay down here and play on the internet and read until I am ready to fall back asleep. Upstairs I have a bed/TV combo guest room, but there is a half awake cat stalking that floor and my return will only call for constant petting until she is back asleep. Then again, I will already be in bed when I get sleepy so I could just roll over and pass out. On the other hand down here in the basement I have two books that I am currently reading, one scary and one that is interesting but a guaranteed yawner; but reading involves thinking and right now my brain is over 50% mush so reading might be out. I do have the sleep inducing sofa down here, it's so squishy and warm. This decision could also be risky considering I am getting the crazy hot flashes again, what to do, what to do.

Right now I wish I had an on call decision maker, I could just call her up give her two situations and she could tell me which scenario to go with. Yes I'm pathetic and complaining is my favorite past time, but man this no sleeping thing bends me out of shape. The big questions in life have been whittled down to weighing the pros and cons of sleeping in the basement or the guest bedroom.

I think I'm going to make the trek upstairs. I'm not entirely happy with this decision; I have to be quiet up there and remember the 15lb. stalker, well she found me down here so when we go up she is going to be in play mode. The decision really boils down to the fact that I need something to entertain me and since Nat wouldn't enjoy being forced awake TV is my next best choice.


Upstairs I go, to further my cause in the never ending quest for a full nights sleep. My enemy Lupron will be around for the next two weeks so expect more 4am blogs in the future; in a few days I will even be used to it so the whining Suzi will be the sadly accepting Suzi and normal blogging should return.